Forty pounds of turkey, 15 pounds of potatoes, two quarts of gravy, eight boxes of stuffing mix, two 10-by-15-inch pans of Jello, a gallon of heavy whipping cream, 16 sticks of butter, four jars of jam and dessert. Ahh — it does this mama’s heart good. (My cardiologist may disagree.)

We celebrated the marriage of one of our daughters last Friday, and our children who live outside of Utah made it back for the occasion. On Saturday, we celebrated Thanksgiving early, so our out-of-towners could be with us.

Cooking for 35 people

Thanksgiving dinner is unquestionably a big meal for our family that now numbers 35 (not all pictured above). There was a time, though, that I fed 22 people every day, so cooking large amounts feels pretty familiar. Still, Thanksgiving requires more planning than most meals. I use a checklist, both on my phone and on the kitchen white board, so multiple sets of eyes can help us not forget anything. We also plan in reverse, knowing the time we want to eat and then working backward so that all the food will be ready at the appointed time.

I often get asked how I cook for so many. We use both of our ovens, the microwave, big pots and now, an outside smoker. For a number of years, we cooked our turkeys in two electric roasters sitting on the counter, but for the last couple of years, we’ve been able to cook them outside in a smoker. Amazingly juicy turkey.

We fit our family around one table that seats 20, and on holidays, we add extra tables until all have a place to sit. We have two very large turntables on the big table, making it much easier to pass the food around.

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Conversation

One of the best parts of getting everyone together is the conversation, or rather, the many conversations that happen around the table and after dinner. All of my children except one are adults and now, there are conversations about money management and investments, childbirth and raising children, and occasional discussions about Greg and me down-sizing. We’re at least slightly interested, but the kids are absolutely not interested in us selling the home we’ve been in for the last 20 years.

There are also the “family lore” stories. This year, more than one started with “Mom probably doesn’t know this, but ...” Sometimes I wonder how kids survive childhood. In our previous home, one of our sons set up a zip line from the second-story porch to the fence (and by set up, I mean tied a rope). He then went down it using a sock. It worked, so he did it again! I found out on Saturday that multiple kids would climb out bedroom windows to hang out on the roof. Decent place for stargazing, I guess.

We don’t often discuss politics. Our family members run the gamut from Republican to Democrat to libertarian, from very active in the political process to not active at all. We could definitely work on “Disagreeing Better,” but like 77% of Americans, we prefer not to discuss it. (Last year, that number was 66%.)

Games

We also love to play games as a family. There are enough of us that we usually need multiple games going at the same time — and it gets loud. One of the amusing parts of having had multiple children move out of our home is that we all have forgotten that it used to be that loud every day.

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Some of our current favorites are The Werewolves of Miller’s Hollow, The Great Dalmuti, What Do You Meme (the Family Edition), and for some of the kids with more patience than I, Risk and Monopoly. My husband enjoys jigsaw puzzles but he has few helpers until he’s about 95% done.

Giving thanks

At the end of the day, Thanksgiving is not as much about the food as it is about relationships. The people around our table change, but all are welcome. Some of our children have experienced divorce, while others are just beginning relationships. We’ve had friends, extended family, friends of extended family and more around our Thanksgiving table. All are welcome.

Several years ago, I bought a wall hanging at Hobby Lobby. “When you have more than you need, build a longer table, not a higher fence.” It’s the perfect mantra for our family. If you’re hungry on Thursday, come on over. We have plenty to share.

Holly Richardson is the editor of Utah Policy.

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